- You missed your quiet time. When things went wrong during the day, you attributed it to God's disappointment for missing your time with Him.
- You had an especially worshipful time with the Lord, reading His Word, praising Him, and interceding for your friends. When you needed the Lord's help with a particular problem, you felt He owed you this favor.
I will admit that it has crossed my mind that the reason John and I haven't gotten pregnant was because we weren't close to God (going to church, nourishing our spirit, worshiping Him.) Conversely I also have though that God should let me get pregnant because I did things in the "right" order... I mean, he blesses people who don't want/care for/about children with them, so of course he should bless me!
And as I sit here and read that - it makes me think of how a young child might react to a parent. Well - I was bad for wetting the bed so I deserve a time out... or I was better than my little sister, so don't I deserve a little more ice cream than she got? It seems so silly when you look at it that way.
I mean, the young child can't help wetting the bed - just as we are bound to sin... we can be sorry for it, but He knows it's going to happen and He's already forgiven us - so why withhold the Gifts he has planned for us? That would be silly!
And the gifts are His to give, not mine to expect. Just because I thought I did something better or deserve more... that's what I think because I am the central focus of my thoughts in that instance. Just like a child might not see something that their sibling did to deserve that same large scoop of ice cream, so I don't see the hearts that God sees in others because I don't look at them as my equals in sin when I am wrapped in my selfishness.
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